Super Black Bass 3D (3DS) review"Too clusmy to be a sim. Too slow to be arcade. Too ugly to get a second look." |
Let's not waste time with obligatory introduction shenanigans. Let's just get right to the point today and say that Super Black Bass 3D is not a good game.
There are not many excuses to offer as to why this should be; it's a long running series stretching back to the NES era, yet its numerous updates through the years have always been met with indifference. In this case, they've released a game with so much inactivity, you'll need to find something to do during the long periods of time where nothing happens. Like enjoy a handheld video game. My PSP hadn't seen a lot of use this year -- this all changed during my playthrough of Super Black Bass 3D.
PRO: Finally got around to beating Ys: The Ark of Napishtim.
CON: Was reminded how good handheld console games could be while suffering through Super Black Bass 3D.
See, I'm not wholly ignorant. I'm aware that you're unlikely to land a fish every five minutes should you venture outside to go on a real fishing trip (don't do it - there's wolves!) but I was more or less finishing entire dungeons in between the landing of two of three fish. That's a crazy amount of down time in a video game. What's worse is you're given absolutely no idea on what it is you might be doing wrong. My record time for inactivity currently stands at forty two minutes. The reward for my patience? To be told the fish I had eventually caught was too small by tournament standards, and would have to be released.
Tournament fishing is the only way to advance the game. You start off proceedings with basic stock lures and rigging, and make your money by selling off the fish you catch. By building up large piles of loot, you can slowly upgrade your equipment and buy handy bits of extra kit, like a boat. Thing is, keeping up to date with gear is the only way to win tourneys, and, even fully tooled up, you're looking at a good few hours of fishing to record yourself a win.
Perhaps things would be more tolerable if Super Black Bass 3D wasn't such a point blank ugly game. The sad fact is, watching things unravel is an exercise in boredom. The water effects are non-existent, making large bodies of water look like a collection of the colour green. An unresponsive green that looks flat enough to resemble a table top more than a lake. Character models are weird freakish mutants, and the fish move stiffly enough to suggest they only have three frames of animation. Everything's just so dull to look at, compounded by the producer's choice on hype screens. Its common practise that, before release, a publisher will drop screenshots onto the Interwebs to drum up excitement for their upcoming title. Observe now what poor Rising Star had to settle upon to whet you appetites:
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Staff review by Gary Hartley (April 23, 2013)
Gary Hartley arbitrarily arrives, leaves a review for a game no one has heard of, then retreats to his 17th century castle in rural England to feed whatever lives in the moat and complain about you. |
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