Elevator Action (NES) review "I wish I could say I liked Elevator Action. If I did, I wouldn't have to justify replaying the same two levels over and over again. I wouldn't have to justify returning to it like a battered wife after it abuses me thoroughly with broken promises and the lingering smell of cheap perfume. I could move on to more amusing games, like Contra or Iron Tank. But I don't like Elevator Action, and I'm determined to stand up for myself now. "

I wish I could say I liked Elevator Action. If I did, I wouldn't have to justify replaying the same two levels over and over again. I wouldn't have to justify returning to it like a battered wife after it abuses me thoroughly with broken promises and the lingering smell of cheap perfume. I could move on to more amusing games, like Contra or Iron Tank. But I don't like Elevator Action, and I'm determined to stand up for myself now.

In Elevator Action you play the role of a hotel roaming spy in a hotel filled with evil top hat wearing double agents. You have to go to certain rooms in this hotel and collect mysterious red packages, all the while shooting your way through the double agent hordes (who I think are supposed to be communists). The elevators that the game takes its name from come into play as your main method of travel between floors. In each level, you collect each red package, and then make your way down to the hotel basement, where you escape in a stylish 70's sports car.

The gameplay plays like a toned down Contra. You can duck, shoot, jump... and you employ these moves against a cadre of endless top hat wearing baddies who duck and shoot back (they can't jump, which I assume real communists can't do either... I don't know, I haven't really done a lot of research for this portion of the review). The stairways and elevators serve to add a timing and puzzle element not unlike the Bug's Bunny Crazy Castle games, making you plan your moves a little in advance, while the constant barrage of enemies keeps things active.

My favourite, if maybe least effective move, is to jump at enemies, which results in what I think must be a jump kick worthy of Chuck Norris, because it causes enemies to instantly keel over and die (which it should be noted, isn't different from any other successful attack). It's a wildly satisfying move, even if it usually results in being gunned down on re-entry. It was worth it to know you probably kicked someone's head off.

It's these kind of mind games I find myself playing every time I plug in Elevator Action. It all sounds very exciting on page, but with limited graphical capabilities and repetitive gameplay, it all boils down to convincing yourself that what you're doing is exciting. It doesn't help that the game is set to a single 8-bit song that lasts about 10 seconds, has no musical structure, and repeats constantly throughout your gaming experience.

And yet... in a word... Elevator Action is fun. I don't know why it's fun. It shouldn't be fun. Along with the god awful music, the game is irritatingly repetitive, following the basic formula for most of the old arcade games which is: rinse, change the level color, repeat. Of course, a lot of the old arcade games are fun, too. In simplicity lies genius, I suppose.

Alright, Elevator Action. Once again, it seems, you have confounded my efforts to detach you from my heart. I came into this fully expecting to give you a 2 or 3, but you've managed to wring a 6 out of me. Oh, but this isn't over. I'll show you. One of these days I'll conveniently forget to store you in a cool dark place. Yes... revenge will be mine. Sweet, sweet, revenge.

Community review by zippdementia (November 09, 2008) Zipp has spent most of his life standing in an open field west of a white house, with a boarded front door. There is a small mailbox there. Sometimes he writes reviews and puts them in the mailbox.