Review Archives (All Reviews)

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	Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic II - The Sith Lords review (PC) Reviewed on June 17, 2010 I knew a game-master once who - apart from being incredibly good at convincing completely uninterested players to try role playing games - was well known for being good at telling stories.
	Metal Slug XX review (X360) Reviewed on June 17, 2010 After completion of Metal Slug XX for the first time, I made a passing comment, in an extremely popular and thought-provoking blog, that it was at least better than Metal Slug 6. I must have been on something that day, because MS6 is mostly a competent game with some flaws; it features backdrops in several locations, like the African countryside, a city under siege by invaders, and a battered bridge, as well as a variety of new foes, both human and alien, to go up against. Also, each of t...
	Tecmo Secret of the Stars: A Fantasy review (SNES) Reviewed on June 14, 2010 The Aqutallion party was a group of five kids blended together into some personality-free amalgam of suck. With the Kustera, I was controlling a ninja, a samurai and a dude named "Shark". Sure, none of them were given any personality, either, but I had a great time imagining them on various quests of heroism while I was running them in circles around a town and fighting giant eyeballs, birds and lizards. And let me tell you — in my imagination, Shark is NOT someone you'd want to anger.
	Dragon Age: Origins review (PS3) Reviewed on June 14, 2010 Part of me will genuinely smile when people talk about video-game "auteurs" - as individual studios, if not just specific game-designers, put their characteristic mark on a particular genre or type of game. But then again, it could very well be that the "auteurship" is just a sign of how the game-developer has now achieved full serial production. In Bioware's case, that would be spinning their "personality generator" to decide what possible motivation any of the many characters that litter the g...
	LEGO Rock Band review (WII) Reviewed on June 13, 2010 Maybe in any other game, I would feel pretentiously ashamed from having any kind of musical association with Counting Crows and Rascal Flatts, but the adorable Lego overhaul strips the game of the pseudo-seriousness exhibited in other musical titles, be they Rock Band or Guitar Hero. My biggest rival through the tour mode was a disgruntled drum-playing octopus who wasn’t included in the band due to an obscure rule on sea life being allowed in a contracted band, and I had to help demolish a strangely indestructible building by playing Tick Tick Boom at it until it fell over.
	Split/Second review (PS3) Reviewed on June 12, 2010 I sat down to write this review, and as with everything else, started thinking of ideas for an introduction. I came up with a few good lines here and there, strung them all together, backspaced it all, then tried again. I rinsed and repeated a few times more than Rapunzel if she had a cleanliness compulsive disorder. I took a step back and tried to figure out why I was unhappy with all of my attempts. After a few minutes stewing upon the quandary I came upon it…
	Slime Master review (X68K) Reviewed on June 12, 2010 Slime Master stars a lovely blonde lass with perky breasts. Since the developers failed to give her a name, I'll call her Pamela. She's a shy one, requiring not one but two bedroom visits before getting naked.
	Prince of Persia: The Forgotten Sands review (X360) Reviewed on June 12, 2010 Prince of Persia: The Forgotten Sands is the closest Ubisoft has ever come, and probably ever will come, to replicating 2003’s brilliant The Sands of Time. It certainly took them long enough to figure out that this is what we’ve always wanted; Ubisoft’s habit with this series has been to try something new, be taken aback by criticism, and then revert to formula when they realize that what they created never needed to be tampered with.
	Baldur's Gate: Dark Alliance II review (PS2) Reviewed on June 12, 2010 Mordoc illustrates he's smarter than everyone, which proves to be a mistake, as that sort of tomfoolery will DEFINITELY turn your attention towards him. Also, there are a couple of optional areas you can raid for treasure and each character has his or her own specific side quest. All in all, you'll spend a good number of hours killing stuff and collecting treasure.
	Deadly Premonition review (X360) Reviewed on June 11, 2010 The biggest draw Deadly Premonition has going for it is its setup being largely influenced by the TV show Twin Peaks. Hilariously, that's also the reason why it was delayed, because media outlets noticed the huge similarities back when the game was originally called..... wait for it..... Rainy Woods. Apparently, the developers didn't do much to change things with the delay, since you can still see a large resemblance; DP begins as Francis York Morgan, a special agent for the...
	Hexyz Force review (PSP) Reviewed on June 11, 2010 If you're looking for the next big thing in JRPGs, you're better off looking elsewhere, but if you have an itch for some traditional JRPG goodness, Hexyz Force might be just the thing to scratch it.
	Blur review (X360) Reviewed on June 07, 2010 the weapons that you have at your disposal aren't particularly thrilling. The most explosive of them are the homing missiles, as well as mines that sit on tracks like rubber balls with black rings around them. The mines are easily avoided and even the missiles can be shaken from your trail with a well-timed swerve. Shields and nitrous boosts look to add strategy to the proceedings, plus I like the fact that you can hold as many as three items at once, but the races are so focused on providing a frantic experience that any of that theoretical strategy is rendered null and void. You'll quickly discover that in most instances, you can do alright by using items immediately rather than hoarding them.
	Picross 3D review (DS) Reviewed on June 06, 2010 You basically just knock blocks around with your stylus and hope that you hit the right ones so that you can keep chipping away at a mass of blocks and turn them into a three-dimensional image of a flower or a butterfly or some guy walking through a doorway or whatever else. It doesn't sound exciting—and it isn't—and it doesn't sound engaging... but it is.
	flOw review (PS3) Reviewed on June 06, 2010 FlOw's concept was originally created for a flash-application with the same name. I thought about it as "that eating game" at the time, because it was unique, and because you were eating things.
	The Legend of Dragoon review (PSX) Reviewed on June 04, 2010 The connection you develop with each of the characters enables you to feel exactly as they do. Not even the occasionally rough translation interferes with the raw emotion that somehow manages to clearly express itself regardless of the situation. You’ll laugh at old-timer Haschel and naïve Meru’s goofy antics. You’ll hope and pray for the best when things turn grim. You may even weep during the most tragic moments where you’ll be left questioning what happens next.
	Konami Classics Vol. 2 review (X360) Reviewed on June 04, 2010 Are you a Contra fan, own a 360, and have no access to the Live service? Then I'm sorry Konami has intentionally put you in such a bad situation with Konami Classics Vol. 1 and Vol. 2, because you're forced to spend $40 just to play two games. With a move like that, I don't see how this doesn't encourage fans to just use an emulator, instead. For everyone else, what's worse is that Vol. 2 as a whole doesn't have the same pitiful excuse as Vol. 1 of having a "solid" price tag. If yo...
	Konami Classics Vol. 1 review (X360) Reviewed on June 04, 2010 What you have in Konami Classics Vol. 1 are three titles that are already available on Xbox 360's Live Arcade service: the classic Frogger, the arcade version of Super Contra, and one of the most popular Castlevania titles to date, Symphony of the Night. So if you have Live and are interested in one or all three games, then download them, because this release isn't aimed at you. This collection is clearly targeted at gamers that just don't have access to Live. To these people, Konami C...
	God of War III review (PS3) Reviewed on June 02, 2010 A while back I wrote a review for God of War I. At the time, I wasn’t entirely sure what I loved so much about the game, so I went with the standard “Kratos is a total bad-ass” angle and thus repeated what a thousand other reviewers had already said, many more eloquently than I did. Then I played God of War III and realized that brutality is not what made God of War great.
	Uno review (X360) Reviewed on June 02, 2010 For the most part, Uno is a laid-back, chilled experience that can either be played as a bite-sized relaxant in between bigger games or as a surprisingly easy way to burn away several hours.
	Alan Wake review (X360) Reviewed on May 31, 2010 As befits a horror story, especially one about a bestselling author, Alan Wake begins with a Stephen King quote: “Nightmares exist outside of logic, and there’s little fun to be had in explanations; they’re antithetical to the poetry of fear.” The game then promptly drops us into a dream sequence in which the title character is alone in the woods, being stalked by a crazed hitchhiker. The man warps in and out of existence as if moving by medium of shadow, seemingly propelled by some myste...

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