Review Archives (All Reviews)

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Available Reviews
	Mutation Nation review (NEO) Reviewed on August 11, 2008 Against all other arguments, I typically feel that porting an arcade title to a home system, disenchants a game's entire theme. What could amuse me more than spending hard earned (used loosely) quarters to fill up a machine so that I can improve my in-particular gaming prowess in order to impress, infuriate and downright discourage random challengers or assistants? It's definitely not playing a marathon of Tekken with your best friend on the couch, to find the fictional fighting that started out...
	BioShock review (PC) Reviewed on August 10, 2008 First Impression:
	Roller Coaster Tycoon 3 review (PC) Reviewed on August 10, 2008 Following on from the well-received Transport and Railroad Tycoon, Chris Sawyer’sRollercoaster Tycoon in 1999 helped paved the way to the many tycoon games we see today, even if it is now a highly-milked genre. The unanticipated success of RCT really gave Bullfrog’s cumbersome Theme Park sim a kick up the rear end by showing how a game designing roller-coasters and theme parks was meant be done, and five years on this third outing finally introduces it to 3D graphics. Although the ...
	Word Zapper review (A2600) Reviewed on August 09, 2008 A good number of these things will ram into you and bump your ship a smidgen off to the side, making it tougher to get a bead on the proper letter. Another type threatens to make the game fun by temporarily scrambling the letters, so you don't know when the one you're looking for will appear. And the final type just obliterates your ship — a tactic that's far more useful in preventing players from spelling words than those used by the other shapes. You can destroy these objects, but there's no real point, as they aren't hard to dodge and you get no reward for doing so.
	Worms Armageddon review (PC) Reviewed on August 09, 2008 Summon an air strike to blast hemmed in opponents into oblivion. Place a mine near a mass of fighters and watch as the resulting explosion sends worms flying in multiple directions. Toss a sheep at a semi-distant enemy and survey the damage as it detonates with the force of a stick of dynamite. Smile as any survivors curse your name, vowing vengeance, shaking their tiny fists in rage.
	Blast Works: Build, Trade, Destroy review (WII) Reviewed on August 08, 2008 When was the last time you played an old-school arcade shooter? Come on, be honest. It’s not like you’ve got much of a choice, anyway. Those titles are of a dying breed; considering the onslaught of hundred-hour RPGs and action-packed FPSes, it’s little wonder why the old ways have essentially passed away. As a result, shooters have had to fall back on bland attempts at creating stories or generic anime characters to carry their appeal. Others have been reduced to nothing but a screen filled wit...
	Soulcalibur IV review (PS3) Reviewed on August 07, 2008 Certainly there were many things I could've introed this game with, such as "rarely seen a game of such calibur" or "here's one with soul." But those suck. I'm going straight for the jugular on this one.
	Packaging Man review (PC) Reviewed on August 07, 2008 "Packaging Man" is no more worth playing than any of the other hundred or so shitty Pac-Man clones built and distributed via Flash. It's noteworthy in that it comes packed with a bleeding heart Dogwood Alliance spiel denouncing fast food companies for utilizing cheap paper. The root of Dogwood Alliance's cause should be 1) attacking the actual companies producing, not buying, the product and 2) lobbying the government for intervention to regulate the producers. But large,...
	Swordquest: FireWorld review (A2600) Reviewed on August 07, 2008 Well, my nine-or-10-year-old mind had an absolutely FANTASTIC time wandering aimlessly through this maze and struggling through one action sequence after another, only to grab a couple of items, put them in another room and.....see nothing happen. I vaguely recall getting a clue once. That moment was so exciting, it shocked my body into puberty. And then I realized I'd lost my official Fireworld comic book, so that clue couldn't have been more worthless to me.
	Packaging Man review (PC) Reviewed on August 06, 2008 All superheroes should hire image consultants. Most go awry with too-tight costumes or fluorescent colors. Packaging Man needs a little help in that area – a boring green shirt and hat will really only work for a plumber – but the real problem is his name. Dogwood Alliance designed this game as a platform to educate about deforestation in the southeastern United States.
	Guitar Hero: On Tour review (DS) Reviewed on August 06, 2008 At its best moments, this mini edition will still fly you through hand-wrenching solos. For a franchise that pulls a lot of its thrills from shredding with a plastic axe, though, On Tour doesn't have the setup to be at its best enough.
	Contra: Shattered Soldier review (PS2) Reviewed on August 06, 2008 After the disaster that was C: The Contra Adventure (fun fact: it was my first PlayStation game), the Contra series was pretty much dead at that point in time. I didn't believe that, if a new game did come out after, it would be like the originals. But, four years after C: The Contra Adventure came out, Contra: Shattered Soldier was released for the PS2, and, well... I didn't get a chance to play it.
	Chase the Chuckwagon review (A2600) Reviewed on August 06, 2008 To pick up your own copy of Chase the Chuckwagon, you had to buy a bunch of Ralston-Purina's products and send in the proofs of purchase. Not surprisingly, very few of these games wound up in gamers' hands and the majority of the cartridges were destroyed. This ingenious idea might go a long ways towards explaining why, a decade after this site's creation, I still had to add Spectravision to our list of developers in order to include it with this game's data.
	1942: Joint Strike review (X360) Reviewed on August 06, 2008 While most of the game is manageable enough if your twitch gaming skills haven't grown too rusty, boss encounters can be a different story entirely. Even the adversary you face at the conclusion of the first stage is beefy, unleashing a wicked spread shot and heat-seeking missiles when he's not pelting you with standard shots from one of several turrets. Emerging from the encounter in one piece requires you to unleash your most convincing assault as quickly as possible, since dodging and weaving will only get you so far and is ultimately destined to fail if you have to keep it up for too long (plus your rating for that encounter will drop and you don't want that).
	Kirby 64: The Crystal Shards review (N64) Reviewed on August 05, 2008 Kirby’s Dream Land may have been short and easy, but it was never boring, with levels often vertically oriented to take advantage of Kirby’s flight capabilities. Kirby can still fly here (though the ability is more limited), but most of these stages could be completed by any generic platformer star: Walk forward, defeat a few enemies, jump a few times, move on. And damn, is Kirby ever slow. You’ve got to double-tap a direction on the d-pad just to make him bolt at an adequate pace, and even then there’s the unwavering sense that he’s wading through invisible mashed potatoes.
	Pac-Man: Championship Edition review (X360) Reviewed on August 05, 2008 Pac-Man is an icon of video game history. He is in fact not only a video game icon; he has also touched the pop culture world. In his 25 years of existence, he has had many games and spin-offs. Though most of them have been clones of the original game or adventure games that have taken Pac-Man of his original setting, puzzle games.
	Rez HD review (X360) Reviewed on August 05, 2008 Let's imagine for a bit here, you're a hacker and you know of the existence of a computer that may hold the answer to all that is life, the universe and everything. That computer is heavily secured and packed with the most sophisticated anti-hacker software ever created. Would you try to hack that computer?
	Space Invaders Extreme review (DS) Reviewed on August 05, 2008 The old series are getting a comeback, Pac-Man, Mario, Galaga, etc. They are also getting remade for the current generation of consoles and handhelds. Taito is celebrating Space Invaders 30th anniversary with a BANG with the release of Space Invaders Extreme, same old game with a new twist.
	Packaging Man review (PC) Reviewed on August 05, 2008 While Pac-Man is an endearing classic because of the constant challenge and addictive gameplay it provides, though, Dogwood Alliance's effort lacks the substance it needed to exist as more than a fleeting memory. It's over almost before it begins, it's ugly and there's not much value in the long term. Sort of like deforestation, I can almost imagine someone from the company quipping, and maybe he'd be right.
	The Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind review (PC) Reviewed on August 05, 2008 Morrowind's atmosphere is so all encompassing despite the derivative high-fantasy setting that it's an enormous challenge not to be blown away at regular intervals. This atmosphere stretches beyond the realms of the delicious visual design, or the eerily fantastic soundscapes, right up to those little moments of the game where you simply can't believe what's happening.

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