Review Archives (Staff Reviews)
You are currently looking through staff reviews for games that are available on every platform the site currently covers. Below, you will find reviews written by all eligible authors and sorted according to date of submission, with the newest content displaying first. As many as 20 results will display per page. If you would like to try a search with different parameters, specify them below and submit a new search.
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Castlevania: Lament of Innocence review (PS2)Reviewed on June 08, 2011Mr. Exposition gives you the details of the plot, which basically comes down to Walter being a bit bored with eternal life, so for amusement, he kidnaps the loved ones of potential worthy opponents in order to engage in combat with the vengeful fighters. The old man lost his daughter to the vampire, but not his life or humanity. No, he's kept around to serve as a general store, so desperate to avenge his loss that he'll charge an arm and a leg for life-restoring potions and armor. A true humanitarian, this guy. |
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Great Baseball review (SMS)Reviewed on June 03, 2011Didn’t Sega ask itself that most obvious question that begs answering even now? What if the baseball game we make for our beloved Master System isn’t great? What then? Won’t we look like fools? What then? Will we fold? Most likely someone did ask that question, but was promptly fired and replaced by someone else’s son, and the so-so game that is Great Baseball was released anyway. |
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Frozen Synapse review (PC)Reviewed on June 03, 2011Generally speaking, multiplayer matches consist of a few minutes of head-scratching, a bit of experimentation, a final check, a click of the ‘Prime’ button, and an edge-of-seat wait for your opponent to submit his or her next turn. It’s often sensible to go and get on with something else while the time ticks away, but it’s difficult to do so when you’re so invested. |
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Thor: God of Thunder review (PS3)Reviewed on June 01, 2011You won’t have to play Thor much at all to see that the title is inspired by the highly successful God of War series. Kratos, the bald-headed warrior from that other series, has simply been replaced here by the blond-haired and impetuous Thor. Instead of wielding a whip, he swings a hammer around like a sword… when he’s not grabbing monsters three or four times his size and wrestling them to the ground by the horns. This is a “T”-rated game, though, so there are no severed heads or geysers of blood and there are no naked women in mini-games or elsewhere. Thor may be a god, but he lives in a bland world. |
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Virtua Tennis 4 review (X360)Reviewed on May 31, 2011It’s no easy task to follow up a perfect original game with sequel after sequel. Virtua Tennis will always be Virtua Tennis, no matter how you package it. In other words, Virtua Tennis will always be a joy to play. |
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The Incredibles review (XBX)Reviewed on May 30, 2011The story of Bob Parr and his gifted family of superheroes (wife, Mrs. Incredible; children, Violet and Dash) is told inexcusably poorly. When you finish the adventure, you still won’t know what the movie is about. |
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B Team: Metal Cartoon Squad review (DS)Reviewed on May 30, 2011Here’s the thing; I’ve not played Cannon Fodder since the early nineties, but I still recall the stand out levels, the clever geography and can appreciate the more subtle parodying of the hells of war. In its attempt to revitalise an older way of thinking, all B Team has managed to do is highlight the competence of that it tries to ape and show that it still can’t eclipse a game made almost two decades previous. |
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Dungeons & Dragons: Daggerdale review (X360)Reviewed on May 26, 2011Dungeons & Dragons: Daggerdale has a lot of glitches, very little plot, almost no enemy variety and a sloppy interface that sometimes makes playing the game a chore. The first few hours almost immediately feel tedious, but the game improves from there. Unfortunately, it never really does anything especially memorable. |
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Dead or Alive: Dimensions review (3DS)Reviewed on May 25, 2011Environments are expectedly gorgeous and expansive, with cascading waterfalls and rope bridges that span wide chasms. There also are the underground laboratory and ancient rooftop venues, and you can still knock your opponent from high ledges and then follow to kick his or her butt on lower ground. In other words, any concessions that had to be made due to the hardware have minimal impact on the presentation… when it comes to fights. |
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Naruto Shippuden: Shinobi Rumble review (DS)Reviewed on May 24, 2011In practice, Shinobi Rumble doesn't deliver superior single-player combat. The fighting mechanics are technically simple, the computer's strategies are equally unsophisticated, and the story mode is simple shorthand. If you're going at this solo, the game will occupy a few hours and then be forgotten forever. |
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The Witcher 2: Assassins of Kings review (PC)Reviewed on May 23, 2011If you can look past the balancing, pacing and technical issues, there is an extremely solid RPG here - nothing especially innovative, but definitely a game that sets out to be the most absorbing, rich and spectacular experience it possibly can be. It’s a disappointment because it largely succeeds in that goal while fluffing the basics. The best RPG of the current generation? With a bit more care, it could have been. |
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L.A. Noire review (X360)Reviewed on May 19, 2011What eventually passes for core gameplay in LA Noire is a bad guessing game in which you have to decide whether people are lying and which bits of evidence from your inventory confirm the lie. It's all very vague, and you'll feel like quite the schmuck when you're sure you've cornered a suspect, only to realize that the game's writer was on a different page. Not that it matters, which is a terrible thing to say about core gameplay. |
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Dragon Warrior II review (NES)Reviewed on May 19, 2011Without those rose-colored memories, what we're left with is a decent older RPG that was a marked improvement on the first Dragon Warrior, but more than merely a step behind the third and fourth NES installments. I've played through those two games multiple times. When I picked up Dragon Warrior II a year or two after initially beating it, I think I got about halfway through before losing interest. |
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Mount & Blade: With Fire and Sword review (PC)Reviewed on May 18, 2011This kind of incompetence is old news, although one would have hoped that for the series' third outing the AI squadmates would be better at self-preservation. What makes it more frustrating than in the past, however, is that you simply cannot be enough of a superhero to make up for their ghastly mistakes. Because now there are all these guns, you see. |
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MLB 11: The Show review (PS2)Reviewed on May 16, 2011MLB 11: The Show rings in the new year with a fresh take on the baseball franchise, complete with up-to-date roster changes and overhauled batting mechanics. |
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Brink review (X360)Reviewed on May 12, 2011Like Quake Wars, Brink has excellent bot support, which makes it a viable single-player game. Or, even better, a game you can enjoy with a small group of friends playing among bots. It's remarkable how well the AI can handle this relatively complicated game, making use of different weapons, different class abilities, the movement system, and various elements of the maps. In fact, one of the best ways to learn a map is to follow a bot. When it comes to competent bots making multiplayer more than just multiplayer, medium budget games like Brink and Section 8 put to shame AAA franchises like Halo and Call of Duty. |
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Shining Force II review (GEN)Reviewed on May 10, 2011There’s a reason why I’ve revisited Moun on an almost yearly basis, and beaten the hell out of goat-eared mages. And it’s the same reason why I’ll meet up with FREYJA around the same time next year and do it all over again. |
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Vampire Moon: The Mystery of the Hidden Sun review (DS)Reviewed on May 09, 2011Vampire Moon: The Mystery of the Hidden Sun takes a good idea and does absolutely nothing with it. |
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Wall Street Kid review (NES)Reviewed on May 09, 2011The polished interface makes it easy to keep your attention where it should be: on deadlines. Those deadlines do a remarkably good job of building tension because you know that if you make too many mistakes, you’ll lose everything. Stocks go up in value or drop sharply, so complacency works against you. There’s a certain element of surprise, as well. You might get a hot stock tip and dump everything to invest in a new stock, only to see the next day that the stock you previously owned enjoyed a tremendous increase just after you ditched it. When you’re trying to drive up the value of your portfolio in time to buy a new car (or else face a ‘Game Over’ screen), losses and missed opportunities really hit home. |
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Wings of Wor review (GEN)Reviewed on May 07, 2011This is a fantasy game and I don't mean a "control a cute witch as she blasts hordes of adorable critters who turn into lollypops and flowers" fantasy. I'm talking about a dark fantasy where you're in control of an angel descending into a macabre, hellish world to confront grotesque monstrosities seemingly conjured from the worst nightmares of the game's designers. |
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